Sigh

Lately I've been feeling everything but happy. The joy of the Lord is my strength and I am so convinced it is what is keeping me. My emotions are just so messed up and for the life of me I cannot figure out what is going on, what is the root of it all!!! Is it a place where I'm finding myself in? Or is it a place where God is showing me and teaching me something??? I've been extremely moody, with no explanation. Right now I don't even know but I know I hate where I am.I want to be able to deal with situations better. Guess that is where Jesus comes in. He deals with them for me or gives me the strength to do it.

This season God has me dealing with relationships with other people. He's certainly placing people strategically and certainly at a distance. this time it feels a lot harder but I lay everything at His feet and trust in the fact that He knows what He is doing. At the same time I want people to be around I think I'm pushing people away without realising it. I feel like the friends that are still around I'm messing things up and it makes me want to not want to be around anyone. Strange coming from a people person.

Resting In Jesus is harder than I thought it would be. I'm so accustomed doing something, but right now everything is at a stand still. Ministry: dance, exhortation and other things have come to an almost complete halt... I just want to find my place in this Kingdom.

I'm pressing, definitely pressing.