Youth for Christ asked me to be a writer for their newsletter and I just said yes... and I feel this is what God wants me to do, now I guess all the meetings begin and we plan and whatever else but I'm really excited about it. It's definitely a new venture for me but I can't wait. Even when school starts back it will be something that I can still do. Plus it will help me to stay in the word a lot more.
Yet in the midst of that I feel totally lost.
We are all created with a purpose but these days I am wondering what is mine. I know my talents and gifts (at least what it is now) but I don't know how to use them or where I can use them so at times I feel completely useless at times. God is so silent and I just am seeking Him knowing that I will find Him but not knowing what I will find. The amazing thing is I know I am in His hand and no one can pluck me out and He is still in control. It is in waiting God prepares us for what is to come... prepare us to receive what is for us. But it does not make things any easier.
It took me a long time to learn that He can take everything I throw at Him and then some... what an awesome friend/father/lover I have in Jesus... now He is reminding me that He can take all my complaints too. All my Whys and When and How questions that I have in my heart. So once I'm complaining to Him more than I am to others, I guess that can work. I am trusting Him and holding on to what I know.
In my life I have realised that everyone gets "busy" at the same time. Everyone just pulls away from me... there is no mentors, no close friends around... I know it happens ever so often but it never is easier whenever it happens. I guess God wants me all to Himself.
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